This September, more than 12,000 grandmothers and grandfathers are expected to gather in the tiny village of Knock in County Mayo. They will be there thanks to the efforts of Catherine Wiley, the founder of the Catholic Grandparents Association.
Wiley is an unlikely granny. In person, she is so stylish, youthful and energetic that at first I wonder if she might not be the founder of the Glamorous Grandmothers Association.
But as soon as we get chatting, her commitment to faith is obvious. “Our purpose at Knock, and in all that we do, is to help grandparents keep prayer at the heart of family life and thus, pass on the faith,” says the 71-year-old grandmother of six grandchildren and four step-grandchildren.
In Knock’s historic setting, grannies and grandpas from around the world will pray, find kindred souls and celebrate their role in saving the faith for future generations. It will be the 15th and largest annual pilgrimage that Wiley has organised.
The association explores issues that concern the modern Catholic grandparent in the concrete realities of the lives of many families. How to pass on the faith when there’s divorce in the family? How to cope when the in-laws see faith differently? What to do if grandchildren are not baptised or if your children have become disenchanted with the faith?
“It often seems that the faith of our forefathers is hanging in the balance, especially in the Western world,” says Wiley, with a seriousness in her voice that belies her warmth and friendliness.
Branches of the association meet, pray and chat. Sometimes participants might wish to discuss how the Church has changed since their youth or how to organise a grandparents’ day in school. Groups normally meet once a month, sometimes after Mass to make it easy to attend.
Since its foundation, the association has hosted events in England, Scotland, the United States, the Philippines, Australia, Canada and Tanzania. Wiley spoke at the International Eucharistic Congress in Dublin in 2012 and has addressed three world meeting of families, in Mexico, Milan and Philadelphia.
“I think these events really marked the coming of age of the association. It showed that the importance of grandparents is now recognised at the highest levels of the Church,” Wiley says.
High-profile supporters include Pope Francis, whom Wiley has met four times. “He’s the greatest grandparent God has created,” she says with infectious enthusiasm.
Cardinal Timothy Dolan in New York, Cardinal Seán O’Malley in Boston and Archbishop Gilbert Garcera of the Philippines are also fans. They have said they want branches of the association in their dioceses.
Wiley grew up in County Mayo, one of 10. Delightfully, when I ask where she came in the family, she has to concentrate. She pauses, before confirming that she was the sixth girl in a family of four boys and six girls born with a long religious tradition. Her aunts were nuns, her great uncle an archbishop, and she has an ancestor, John McHale, who was an archbishop in the 17th century.
She knew only one of her own grandparents, but was close to him, although he died before she was six. “He read Bible stories to me,” she recalls. “My first image of prayer was our family rosary, everyone kneeling down in the golden light of the Tilley lamps and candles.” Each grandchild thought they were his favourite.
Wiley left Ireland aged 15 to travel to England in search of work to help her family back home. “It was quite a culture shock. I arrived with no idea where I would stay or where I would work. I got my first job in Wall’s bacon factory in north London by lying about my age.”
“At first, I was a typical Irish immigrant, going to Irish dances and Mass on Sunday. But before long I became lukewarm about practice of the faith. Later, I began doing PR for Island Records, just as the Swinging Sixties were kicking off in London.”
At 21 she met Stewart, who had been previously married with two children of his own. His earlier marriage was declared null by the Church and the couple married in the Catholic Church. (“It was love at first sight,” she says.)
Two children followed. Francesca, 46, is a QC in London and Oliver, 44, works for a charity. All of Wiley’s own grandchildren think they are her favourite.
She stresses that her association in no way undermines parents. “You’re there to support the parents, not to undermine them. They are the primary educators of their children, but by our own parental bond we are naturally there always to help them. You’ve got to be very sensitive, thoughtful and unobtrusive, knowing when to give advice and when to step back.”
In the late 1960s, when Wiley herself was a young mother, the couple began a tour-operating business. “We ran package tour holidays around the Greek islands,” she says, “but soon we pioneered children’s educational summer camps, after our own children attended them in America. They proved successful and spread across the UK.”
The business grew to 1,000 employees and a turnover of millions. In person, Wiley has the efficiency and drive of the successful businesswoman she is.
A hectic London life led the couple to seek a country house. In 1980, they moved into a friary at another important religious site: Walsingham, which is now the administrative hub of her grandparents association.
Built in the 13th century, their house had been a friary until the Reformation, when a farmhouse was built inside the ruins. Wiley and her husband became the first Catholics in the house since the Reformation. It has since become a haven for retired priests whom Wiley has helped nurse through their last years. She is a woman who practises what she preaches and lives by her faith. Her philanthropic involvement has been woven through her life for 50 years, her desire to help others running through her like the colour in a stick of rock.
“My motto, as we travel the world, is: ‘If I can only help one person.’ I would go to Mother Teresa’s home, orphanages or SOS shelters and ask them what they needed.”
In Siem Reap, Cambodia, she asked a local priest what she could do for him. “He replied: ‘We need a church.’” Wiley helped build it. When the plight of Romanian orphans came to light in the early 1980s, Wiley set up her own charity to help.
For now, her focus is her beloved association. She reels off a long list of events and excitements planned for the year ahead, the Knock pilgrimage among them. A second pilgrimage to Walsingham took place this month.
In 2006, at Wiley’s request, Benedict XVI wrote a prayer for grandparents, the first of its kind in the history of the Church. In it, Benedict describes grandparents as “living treasuries of sound religious traditions”. It will be recited on the Knock pilgrimage. Few could claim to be more of a living treasure than Wiley herself.
For more information, visit Catholicgrandparentsassociation.com, email [email protected] or call 01328 820217 (UK ) or 098 24877 (Ireland)
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